HONEST COMMUNICATION

"In order to become more honest in our relationships, we need to stop thinking of honesty as cold, hard truth. We also need to abandon the notion that being honest with children means taking their inventories. Instead, we need to think of honesty and sharing our feelings, ideas, and mistakes and allowing our children to share theirs - without fear of rejection or recrimination. Honesty means expressing affection and making amends, recognizing strengths and achievements. It is a moral fresh air - healthy, cleansing, and restorative." -- Alex Packer

How easy it is to mistake honesty for harsh truths, when in fact honesty can be a refreshingly sweet tonic. Honesty in our relationships with our children must include the words, " I love you" just as freely as it emphasizes the words, " I'm upset with you."

Giving and Getting

"There is no established rule that says one person has to do all the giving and everyone else does the getting. Yet some families cripple themselves by appointing a specific person to be the giver, and nothing ever changes." - Virginia Satir

It is important for children to witness their parents sharing, not only household tasks, but the emotional give-and-take of a healthy relationship as well. Otherwise, they will grow up with distorted ideas about relationships. A good marriage is a relationship in which there is a high degree of mutual the satisfaction. While none of us will ever get all we want or expect from our partner, but we can negotiate in good faith to meet one another's needs.